Archive for Mondays


Posted in Music, Music Recommendations, Music Reviews, Opinions On The News with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on April 6, 2012 by Mallaz

God made it easy on me...

You Beastly Bastard!

Wednesday was my birthday.  I fukkin hate my birthday but a new bucket hat and a Happy Mondays ticket, for the O2 Academy in Newcastle on May 4th, helped to ease the blow.  As also did Swede Mason, who released another video onto YouTube on my birthday.  Check out Swede Mason’s YouTube channel on this link and subscribe for future releases.

Swede Mason on YouTube

Swede Mason’s new track is titled ‘Well bugger to you, you Beastly Bastard’ and is totally typical of Swede Mason.  More video sampled and cut into a new video with added beats to create an incredible audio-visual collage.  While ‘Well bugger to you, you Beastly Bastard’ may not be Swede Mason’s greatest work his genius is unrivalled.  It is still a truly epic work, however in my opinion not as brilliant as ‘Jeremy Clarkson’s Beatbox’ or ‘Bill Wyman’s Metal Detector’ to name but a few.

Apparently, according to Clair, the video for this track is taken from The King’s Speech or something.  I’ve never heard of it or seen it, but then I’m not Ed Zachary a film buff.

Well Bugger to you, you Beastly Bastard’ is vulgar, repetitive and really quite childish, yet it is amusing, entertaining and quite frankly fukkin fantastic!

Check out Swede Mason latest work on the link below.

Swede Mason – Well bugger to you, you Beastly Bastard 

Also check out my blog about Swede Mason in my musical recommendations category or on the next link, where you’ll find links to some of my favourite Swede Mason tracks.

Swede Mason Blog

Some Recommendations

While I’m on the subject of music, I may as well drop a couple of recommendations.


I’ll start with Brotha Priah, another musician who does something a bit different.  Priah is a massively underrated artist who is starting the make an impression on the North East music scene and has the potential and drive to go a long way.

Brotha Priah uses a Boss RC-300 looping station and a Kaosspad to build up tracks on the spot.  What makes it all the more impressive however is that Priah makes all of the sounds with his voice, beat-boxing beats, harmonies and bass-lines and looping them to create unique tracks.  He has an exceptional talent and is extremely passionate about music.  Priah explains it better than me, so click on the following link for a video of Priah explaining how he does what he does.

Brotha Priah – Boss RC-300 + Kaosspad 3 Intro 

Don’t forget to subscribe to Brotha Priah’s YouTube channel.

Brotha Priah on YouTube

I first noticed Brotha Priah when I seen him performing at SubLevel2 at The Head of Steam a while back.  He was one of the artists the particularly stood out that night, in amongst local Hip Hop heavyweights Baron Von Alias & MistaBreeze and Rick Fury.  Read my take on that night on this link;

As I mentioned, Priah is starting to build his reputation on the North East music scene, particularly with the Hip Hop, DubStep and Drum n Bass crowds and is quickly becoming one of the usual suspects at live events in the region.  With a few live performances coming up in April, including Rex Regis’ album launch, on 11th, and The Warehouse Party, on 28th, Priah is starting to make his mark.

He’s also performing at my gig, The Egg at The Telegraph, Orchard Street, Newcastle on Saturday.  Click the next links for more information on The Egg.

The Egg

Facebook Event


Whilst on the theme of artists with individuality, my next recommendation is a band so unique that they don’t fit inside any standard genre classification.

Honey Chrome’s sound is a marvellous mash-up of many genres, with many different influences.  Not only do Honey Chrome differ from every other band, each of their tracks differs in style and sound from each other.

With Honey Chrome there’s synthetic bass, heavy drums, rocking guitars and distorted vocals aplenty.  Call it whatever you want, there’s a bit of everything in there.  You’ll notice influences from many different artists within Honey Chrome’s sound and they bring it all together in a brilliantly orchestrated fusion.  The effects are truly profound.

Honey Chrome

I think my favourite Honey Chrome tracks so far are ‘I Think I Luv U’ and ‘Fractured Days’.  As afore mentioned, Honey Chrome’s style and sound changes between tracks and those two are more mellow and more suited to my tastes than the heavier ‘Mind Machine’, which would have plenty of appeal with Rock and Heavy Metal fans.

Honey Chrome are playing in Stockton on Tees tonight at The Sun Inn along with The Skank Sinatra & Friends Show and Dressed Like Wolves.  Doors open at 7.30pm, find further details of that on this link;

I have also got Honey Chrome booked to perform at two events for me in May.  They will be playing at The Telegraph on Friday 4th May and at The Troll at The Bridge, at The Bridge Hotel in Newcastle on Saturday 19th May.  Check out the video of Honey Chrome performing live at The Telegraph at my gig in March on this next link.

Honey Chrome – I Think I Luv U (live at The Telegraph) 

Details of the May 4th gig at The Telegraph are still to be confirmed.

The Troll at The Bridge on Saturday 19th May is being held at The Bridge Hotel, Castle Garth, Newcastle upon Tyne.  Entry is £3 payable on door.  Doors open at 7.30pm and the event will run until 11pm.  Also performing that night will be local Indie Pop sensation Emergency Door Release, the ever-impressive Alternative act Artisam and Funk-Rock band Downtown Lester Brown.

Check out Honey Chrome’s website –

And check out the Facebook Event for The Troll at The Bridge and the four acts involved on the following links.

The Troll at The Bridge 

Honey Chrome

Emergency Door Release


Downtown Lester Brown


After what feels like a lifetime in waiting, it’s almost finally here. Tomorrow night at The Telegraph on Orchard Street, behind Newcastle’s Central Station is The Egg!

The Egg is a night of live music and a whole new experience.  A culmination of artists from across a wide range of genres, The Egg offers something for every musical taste.  There’s the notorious Baron Von Alias & MistaBreeze with the awesome Eliza Lawson delivering North East Hip Hop with a comic book twist.  Another of the main highlights are the epically vibrant Funky Ska band Ginger Snap & The Style Pile giving you something to dance to.  Artisam, who are also performing The Troll at The Bridge, will be performing as a five-piece for the first time after the addition of their new drummer and fiddler.  We’ll also have some Krautedelic Electro Fuzz from Parastatic, something I’m really looking forward to seeing live.  As mentioned earlier there’ll also be a live Beat-Boxing performance by the up-and-coming Brotha Priah with his looping station and Kaosspad.  There’s also some acoustic brilliance in the form of Baiqian Jiang and his fingerstyle and a DJ set from Greenline DJ, also known as Dj Id.

Seven different artists on a night that runs til 2am for a paltry £4 is a steal!

Doors open at 7.30pm and the £4 entry is payable on the door.

Further information about The Egg can be found on my blog, along with links to each artist, or on the Facebook on the two links below.

The Egg

Facebook Event

Ginger Snap Jam (photo by Andrew Jessop)

Follow me on Twitter – @Mallaz84

Subscribe to my YouTube channel –

And like my Facebook page –

And now some shit in the news that made me laugh…

I was on Twitter yesterday morning and my timeline was flooded with shit about Samantha Brick, she was also trending.

Now I’d never heard of her and I’m a naturally inquisitive bastard.  So I looked and up, and here’s the jist of what her crack is…

Samantha Brick is some random, moderately attractive, middle-aged blonde writer from The Daily Mail, who wrote an article earlier this week whining on about how difficult life is being beautiful.

Here’s a link to the article, have a gander;

Throughout the article this self-obsessed woman bemoans the strains that her supposed beauty causes her, from bitchy bosses to jealous girlfriends.  She claims that women hate her for no other reason but her “lovely looks.

Samantha Brick’s arrogance and up-your-own-arsery become glaringly apparent with this quote from the article, “Unfortunately women find nothing more annoying than someone else being the most attractive girl in a room.”  Pretty full of herself for someone who claims has many clients who are models, and also doing well on casting gender stereotypes.  She also claims to be “tall, slim, blonde” and often told that she is “good-looking”.

I don’t know about slim though flower… I see a bit of a pot-belly thing going on there.  Have a look at the photos and see if you agree.  She’s also got quite chunky, stumpy looking legs.  To claim she’s “slim” is slightly hopeful.  She’s not in terrible shape for a middle-aged woman of forty-one, but she’s not shaped like Gwen Stefani or Elizabeth Hurley!

As I said before, she’s only moderately good-looking.  In my opinion she’s got a dodgy-looking nose and a freaky, weird smile.  She’s got kind of a Miss Piggy-like face.

At the end of the article she claims to be “probably one of very few women entering their fifth decade welcoming the decline of my looks.”  A statement that seemingly contradicts herself as earlier in the article she stated she works at her appearance.  She works out, doesn’t drink or smoke and rarely eats chocolate.  Not really the actions of a woman in her early forties welcoming the decline of her looks is it?

I’m not even gonna touch that her husband is a Frenchman and wearing soldier clobber in the photos, that’s too easy.

Samantha Brick is a deluded, self-obsessed attention-seeker and I’m bewildered as to why a newspaper would publish such nonsensical bull-shit written to solely to pander the author’s ego.  I mean, that’s not fukkin news is it???

And as if that twaddle wasn’t ridiculous enough for you, the backlash from Samantha Brick spawned another article, this time by Tim Dowling for The Guardian.  You can read that on this next link.

This is yet another prime example of up-your-own-arsery by a self-obsessed, egotistical twat.  Tim Dowling claims that men envy him for his looks.  In my experience most men couldn’t give two shits about how another man looks, the competitive element lies in other things, like sports for example.

I think anyone who uses phrases such as “brooding”, “chiselled jaw” and “soulful, beseeching eyes” to describe themselves appears to be either a purely pretentious cunt or pitching themselves on a lonely hearts dating website.

Tim Dowling prattles on that if you’re a man you probably find him a threat.  One statement that stood out for me was, “I can’t tell you how many male acquaintance shave stopped speaking to me over the years for petty reasons (unpaid debts, being alleged source of unpleasant rumour, refusal to appear as character witness), when jealousy is the transparent cause.

Yeah, sure people start to lose patience and you will fall foul of people if you don’t pay your debts.  As for refusing to be a character witness for a friend, either the friend is a complete scum-bag of Tim Dowling blatantly refused to help a friend in need.  I wonder if the reference was for a job or for court, as he fails to mention any specifics.  Either way it’s pretty shitty and I wouldn’t be best impressed if a so-called mate refused to help where they could in such situations, unless of course it was a seriously bad crime.

He claims also to know exactly how many men have been angered enough by his face to want to punch it.  For some reason I suspect it may be his arrogant, pretentious, self-absorbed attitude that makes people want to smash his fukkin face in, rather than how his face looks.

There is also no mention of Tim Dowling having a partner within the article.  I suspect this is also related to him being a Grade-A plum!


Posted in Music with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on February 3, 2012 by Mallaz
Happy Mondays

“I like that… Turn it up!!!”

My old fella woke me up with a phone call early this afternoon.  Usually, I’m not a fan of being woken up with phone calls but I can make an exception this time.  He’s bought me a ticket for Happy Mondays and Inspiral Carpets at the O2 Academy on 3rd May.  BOOM!

“One day he was admiring his reflection in his favourite mirror…”

I’m getting the ticket for my birthday in April and I can’t fukkin wait!  In May last year I went to see Shaun Ryder and his band playing at The Riverside, as well as Nobby Solano on his trumpet with the Geordie Latinos.  That was one of the best nights of my life… so far!  It also made performing at The Riverside with my old band a life-long dream come true.  By life-long, I mean since May last year.  I played on the same stage as Shaun Ryder once did, class!  See the video of that gig on the link below.

“I can virtually do anything I read…”

Shaun Ryder and Bez are my fukkin idols and the Happy Mondays are by far my favourite band of all time so to get the chance to see the original line-up back together after nineteen years.  I was gutted when the Shaun Ryder 2012 Tour was cancelled but for the Happy Mondays to reform totally makes up for that!


“Smiling like a cat when his milk came through…”

If you haven’t read Shaun Ryder’s autobiography ‘Twisting My Melon’ I suggest you do.  It’s not the best written book in the world but the content, his story, is the most inspiring thing I have ever read!  Clair got me his book for Christmas and I read it over the course of a day.  Never in my life have I read a book that quickly, it usually takes me longer than that to read a newspaper, but this was a captivating read and as I stated earlier, the most inspiring work I’ve ever laid eyes on.  Shaun Ryder is a fukkin genius!  I also got Bez’ book ‘Freaky Dancin’ – Me and The Mondays’ for Christmas and have just started reading that.  Bez isn’t as daft as he appears either.


“You know you talk so hip man, you’re twisting my melon man!”

I’ve also got a ticket for The Stone Roses at Heaton Park in Manchester on 1st July, but Happy Mondays tops that by far!  But that does mean that 2012 is a truly epic year on the gig front.  Now all I need is tickets to see The Farm.

Drop Acid, Not Bombs



Posted in Music, Music Recommendations with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 14, 2011 by Mallaz

I listen to music all of the time and I listen to all sorts of music, new and old, from across almost every genre.  My favourite artists include Shaun Ryder of the Happy Mondays, David Byrne of the Talking Heads, The Rolling Stones, Ian Brown of The Stone Roses and Swede Mason, who I believe should be knighted!

I also listen to a lot of new music, particularly from the North-East because it’s local to me.  So what I’m gonna do is give you some recommendations of what to listen to, based on what I’m listening to these days.  I’ll do my best to cater for different tastes, just because I’m nice like that.

What I’ll do is recommend a handful of acts you may or may not have yet heard of and prattle on a little bit about them.  Then I’ll give you a ten track playlist that will include some of my favourite tracks as well as new stuff worth listening to and then I’ll stick the links to the acts that I have recommended at the bottom.

If you click on any of the highlighted track titles in this blog you will be forwarded to somewhere you can listen to that track online.  Same with highlighted names, they’ll take you somewhere online relative to whatever you’re clicking on.  It’s not rocket science.

The Mojags

To start off with, I highly recommend checking out The Mojags, a young Rock band from North Shields area.

The Mojags performed at The Telegraph for me on December 2nd.  They have bags of talent and, being so young, have limitless potential.  At my gig they did a brilliant cover of ‘Hey Joe’ by Jimi Hendrix.  This is a band that’s going places so keep an eye out for them.

The Mojags at The Telegraph, 2nd December 2011

In 2010 they won the Teenage Kicks Battle of the Bands.  They are also competing in a Battle of the Bands in Redcar next year.  They are in Heat 2 on Friday 20th January 2012.  The Battle of the Bands is held at Coatham Bowl in Redcar and entrance fee for any of the heats is £10.  The event is in aid of charity.  Get down for that and show some support for a great band and help raise some money for charity.

The Mojags can be found on Facebook, YouTube and Soundcloud.  I would recommend listening to ‘Ojay‘ if you’re only gonna listen to one; it’s my favourite of the tracks currently available online.

Also check out this video on YouTube .  It’s The Mojags video of ‘Sychophant‘, shot as their prize for winning the Teenage Kicks competition.

The Stroll

Another band on the way up is Durham based Alternative Indie Rock band The Stroll, who are a new outfit only started in August.  They’ve only got one track online at the minute ‘Different Tune, Different Mood‘ and you can listen to that on Soundcloud.  It’s a catchy track like, and displays a small portion of the talent that these lads possess.

I saw them perform live at LYH the other week when I played there with Downtown Lester Brown.  Being a brand new band they are still doing quite a few covers but their original stuff is quality.  I particularly liked ‘Searching’, which is apparently about looking for magic mushrooms.  Their choice of covers was a cool blend of things ranging from The Beatles to The Stone Roses.

The Stroll

It’s not just the music that makes The Stroll a great band in the making.  The Stroll have a great vibe and energy and create an electric atmosphere at gigs.  They’re a fun band and their crowd interaction is impressive.  Their singer Josh Pringle has good crack and his patter on the microphone in between tracks is entertaining.  This band has it all and I’m tipping The Stroll to become massive!  They epitomise everything I was after when I set up Downtown Lester Brown.  They are a fun, energetic band with a great vibe and attitude as well as plenty of talent and drive.

The Stroll are also performing in the Battle of the Bands, in Heat 1, on Friday 13th January 2012.

I also have them booked for Friday 3rd February 2012 at The Telegraph, behind Central Station in Newcastle.  That’ll be £3 in and the wisest investment you’ll ever make.

Look up The Stroll on Facebook and Soundcloud and remember, you heard it heard first!

Baron Von Alias & MistaBreeze

If Hip Hop’s your bag, here’s another act with a sense of fun.  Hip Hop duo Baron Von Alias and MistaBreeze are an audio-visual spectacle to behold, so I would recommend checking out their videos on YouTube to get the full effect.  The Baron is an emcee time-lord from 1830 and sports a huge tashe, top hat and sunglasses, so you know he’s got a sense of humour, however, he’s also an excellent wordsmith and a born entertainer.

Baron Von Alias

I was put onto Baron Von Alias and MistaBreeze by old school mate Nathan Wood, who has his own radio show.  He recommended I listen to ‘Get Wild, Gan Mental’, which is growing on me but I didn’t take kindly to it at first.  I told Nathan on twitter that I wasn’t impressed and The Baron piped up.  After a bit crack on, The Baron said I should give some of his other material a whirl.  I did, and I was impressed.  I blame Nathan for his poor choice in track selection whilst making recommendations.

There are plenty of quality tracks by The Baron and MistaBreeze so check out their YouTube channel.  You’ll enjoy their official videos and their live stuff.  I’m particularly keen on ‘White Noise’.  The Baron and MistaBreeze do make fukkin awesome videos!  I’d also recommend checking out the video of Baron Von Alias performing ‘Phoney’ on Amazing Beats, because I find it really fukkin impressive.

I saw Baron Von Alias and Mistabreeze performing live at The Head of Steam in Newcastle the other week and they are an act well worth catching.  For £5 you can see them live at The Riverside this Thursday (15th December) .


So that’s three acts for you to check out, now here’s a couple other things that you wanna check out.

The Local Music Show

The Local Music Show presented by Nathan Wood, on Spark Sunderland.

That’s 107FM local radio or can be listened to live online at every Sunday at 4pm til 7pm.

Nathan plays music from local bands from across all different kinds of music so give that a listen and you’re bound to hear something that tickles your fancy.  Mix that with a little bit of low brow humour and smut and you’ve got yourself one canny Sunday afternoon’s listening.

Battle of the Bands

As mentioned earlier, there’s a Battle of the Bands going on in Redcar in early 2012.  The competition is being held at Coatham Bowl, in Redcar, every Friday from 13th January 2012, with the final being held on Friday 9th March 2012.  The entry fee to these events is £10.

The Mojags and The Stroll are both competing in the Battle of the Bands so get down for their heats and show some support.

Heat 1 – The StrollFriday 13th January

Heat 2 – The MojagsFriday 20th January

Battle of the Bands 2012

Now Here’s My Recommended Ten Track Playlist

Here’s a ten track playlist I recommend listening to.  Click on the song title and you’ll be directed either to a YouTube video or somewhere else online that you can hear the track for free.  Enjoy.

Happy Mondays – Yahoo

Mick Jagger – A Memo from Turner

The Mojags – Ojay (live)

The Stone Roses – Good Times

The Stroll – Different Tune, Different Mood

Swede Mason – Bill Wyman’s Metal Detector

Baron Von Alias & Mistabreeze – Its OK

Public Enemy – What You Need Is Jesus

Gorillaz ft Shaun Ryder – Dare

Flowered Up – Weekender

Hopefully you’ve enjoyed what you’ve listened to and if you’ve got any recommendations let me know because I’m always willing to listen to new things.  Also please share this blog so that other people can hear the acts that I have mentioned and to get a little bit more publicity for the charity Battle of the Bands competition.

Thank you.


The Mojags

Facebook –

Soundcloud –

YouTube –

The Stroll

Facebook –

Soundcloud –

Baron Von Alias and Mistabreeze

Facebook –

YouTube –

Bandcamp –

Soundcloud –

Spark Sunderland 107FM

Battle of the Bands 2012

Facebook –

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